Wednesday, March 2, 2014: An attitude that won't stand up in court...

Mick and Dustin. Dustin and Mick. Two men who might just need each other.

The precocious Dustin Martin, famed for single-handed fend-offs that reduce grown men to mere piles of meat and bone, the man is all strength and all talent. More than that, he serves as a living embodiment of the hashtag YOLO generation. Martin lives in the now, the absolute uncompromising present where regrets are archaic and neck tattoos are the epitome of 'sickness', and sickness is not even a bad thing anymore. You get it? He is a bona-fide shave off half your hair, take too many sleeping pills and see what happens YOLO cat, you can't get any more into the moment than that.

Monday, March 17, 2014: Anyone holding their breath has long since dropped dead

"The top four have got every right to think it's between 11 and one, the rest of us ... I would say we're approaching 11 o'clock. There's a lot of sides approaching 11 o'clock. We want to be progressing through 11 o'clock into it. I don't see any reason why that can't be the case. We've got a very good blend of senior players and we've got a good blend in the middle."
Mick Malthouse, Saturday. 

"It's not a matter of whether we're in the window or not, it's a matter of making sure you win enough games of football. The last thing that'll be on our mind or any players' mind is where's the window?"
Mick Malthouse, Sunday

So that's that then, in only a few hours - and following a game in which they were run off their feet by Port Adelaide - Carlton's premiership clock/window is not so much expired as it is now irrelevant. The entire analogy, after forming the basis of his pre-match press conference, was disposed of with the disdain that Malthouse usually reserves for those he's speaking to (or at least a sandwhich-eating cameraman).