September 22, 2014: Disrepute...

Footballs night of nights is finally here. Of course, all that glitz and glamour - the unrivaled decadence of the Palladium Room - is well beyond the average footy fan. Nope, we're a pie and sauce bunch and we're proud of it. There's no need to panic though, or feel left out, because as much as the Brownlow is a night for the women and the Dyson Heppell's of this world, it is also about sport - there is a competition on the running sheet and with God as our witness we will watch it. Oath, we'll do more than just watch it, we'll watch it with a froffy. Hell, we'll even bet on it. Because we are men. Men who drink and gamble and can't tell the difference between shampoo and conditioner and don't even care.

That's why the ads, which are sure to be both long and frequent, will no doubt feature a sizable sampling of the above. Tom Waterhouse will probably be there for no reason, Crown logos will feature prominently, the Sportsbet guy will be yelling at you. The time left over will be used to praise the joy of a fresh cold beer or something smooth spirit mixed with Coke rendering whatever spirit it was irrelevant.

And after all that, any player who happens to overindulge - to not heed the microscopic suggestion that one enjoys that product in moderation - will be heavily sanctioned. They, after all, will have brought the game into disrepute.

In the news...
Sydney will play Hawthorn in the AFL Grand Final. There's heaps of new about that here.